Neurolinguistic Programming & the Power of Affirmative Commands

Big fan of positive thinking. BIG fan. The biggest. I bet you are too and, I bet, when your girl friend comes to cry on your shoulder about her latest heartbreak and tells you she’s given up on finding love you tell her to “think more positively”. Sound familiar?

Well, if this is you, brace yourself for something you may not want to hear… you aren’t helping her. You see, even though you (and probably your heartbroken girl friend on a better day) understand WHY it’s important to think positively, you probably don’t really know how actually do it.

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Now that you’re positively glowing, let’s look a bit more at how to think positively.

Positive thinking and your internal dialogue, I.E. “the things you think about yourself and say to yourself” have the power to literally rewire the synapses in your brain. That’s why confident people always looks so damn good, and make more money and have hot boyfriends. They believe they can do whatever they put their mind to, and so they do! It really IS that simple.

Now if you’re sitting there thinking that money and a hot boyfriend would be nice, but you wouldn’t even know where to start rewiring your brain then let me lay it out for you.

IF MY BRAIN WERE A DOG

I've come to think of my brain as a dog. Bear with me. If I say to a real-life dog "don't sit" he's going to sit; you should try it. He’ll sit very enthusiastically at that. He doesn't understand the negative, he only hears the command, “sit”. And that, my friends, is my brain, and yours too!

Good boy!

DEVELOPING AFFIRMATIVE COMMANDS

In the human world this looks a little like this: I say "I am not unhappy," but my brain only hears the command, "unhappy." Then unhappiness finds it's way into my thoughts, my words, my posture, my relationships. Here are a few more examples of where you can use the power of affirmative commands to change your internal dialogue, and your relationship with yourself:

I’m not ugly -- I am beautiful

I’m not lazy -- I am full of energy

I’m not unhappy -- I am joyful

I’m not a loser -- I am a winner

I’m not poor - I am rich

You get the picture.

If this is a process that is new to you I'd strongly recommend you carry a notebook around with you and every time a negative thought pops up into your head, write it down. Also write down the thoughts that aren't so obviously negative but make you feel bad. After a few weeks go through the list and write down the opposing affirmative command. Then practice, practice, practice. 

DEVELOPING AN AFFIRMATIVE TONE

Let's get back to my dog. So now I know that he will only respond to the action of the command, but what about the tone of my voice? If I tell my dog to "sit" in a deep, angry voice he will not sit - he will most definitely lie down, ears back, looking at me with big puppy eyes and breaking my heart. So, once you have mastered the language of your thoughts think about mastering an affirmative tone. As an example, say the word "happy" in an angry voice - notice the effect. Do you feel happy? (Maybe, you weirdo!) No, you probably don't. Now say "happy" in an upbeat voice with a smile. Do you feel the difference? You are the captain and commander of your own energy.

Start to change the way you think, and the tone you use with yourself today and success will surely follow!

NEUROLINGUISTIC PROGRAMMING

If you want to dive a bit deeper into how you can rewire your brain using your commands and tone then you’re going to LOVE learning about Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP).

NLP explores the connection between our brains (neuro), our language (linguistic) and our behaviour (programming) and how we can master our language to change our thoughts and behaviours. It’s pretty powerful stuff. If you’re into it I highly recommend Richard Bandler’s book, Introduction to NLP: How to Build a Successful Life.

FURTHER RECOMMENDED READING ON NLP